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  • Writer's pictureStephanie Black

A Blonde Farmgirl In the Making Part 2

I woke up in the middle of the night with Boys 2 Men’s “I Swear” running through my head. What in the world?!? You guys, I think it’s been a decade since I’ve heard that song. Where the heck did that come from and what does it mean? Haha. I’m so confused.

I may have discovered my life’s calling. It might have just become my mission to rid the world of all boxed hair dye. I’d for sure be doing all women (and maybe some men) out there a favor.


How does one go about ridding the world of boxed hair dye you might ask? Well…. Consider this your own personal PSA. Friends don't let friends buy boxed hair dye. But also, I might take to hanging out in the hair dye aisle at the local grocery store and smacking it out of people’s hands. I feel like that would be helpful. I’d obviously make the evening news, buuuuut that would probably just help my cause sooooo that could actually work out quite well for me.


But seriously…


Don’t do it, friends. Ever.


For real.


You’ll thank me for that piece of advice. I promise. I mean I'd like to think I'm getting pretty good at the advice thing over here. Viriginity... Hair Dye... Farmlife... God's goodness... How to not get bit by a mouse... It's a diverse resume.


And it should be noted that I'm going to keep awkwardly using the word virginity until it's not awkward anymore. Just over solving the world's problems... one use of the word virginity and one box of hair dye at a time.


But back to the topic at hand.... Blonde...


Today was round number two of going blonde. I decided 3 months ago to go back to blonde. Yes, back. In case you’ve missed it, for almost the first three decades of my life I was blonde.


Today I saw multiple colors of the rainbow. None of which entailed blonde.

  • 5 hours

  • 3 different color stripping product attempts

  • 2 conditioning treatments

  • 3 hair washes

  • 3 blow dying session

And…

  • 1 color to cover up the obnoxious array of colors that my hair currently is.

Not because my hair stylist did anything wrong…. She is absolutely fabulous. Seriously.


But because I used boxed hair dye for 10 years. My bad. I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky… And by the shadow that’s by your side… NEVER AGAIN.


See what I did there?


And for your entertainment, here’s the progress. By the next appointment there is a good possibility of seeing some actual blonde.


Don't worry, she didn't make me leave with orange hair... I'm trying my hand at brunette for the next few weeks. We shall see how that goes.


And since it's a Blonde Farmgirl in the Making.... in our Farmgirl Adventures this week...


Remember that mouse that bit me? I’m pretty sure he’s dead, but I found his family. And by family I mean his entire family. His parents and grandparents and siblings and cousins and second cousins and third cousins and quite possibly some close friends too. I walked out to the barn after dark a few nights ago to feed the chickens and collect eggs and was greeted by a mass scurrying of small creatures. They were everywhere. And the sound of them moving is the stuff nightmares are made of. I’m pretty sure they know I took out one of their own and now they are out to get me. I never thought I would say this but… I need more cats.


Kittens, obviously. I’m currently trying to talk my farm friends into that.


And a mini horse. They definitely need a mini horse. Not because of anything to do with the mice, but just because a mini horse would be the coolest. Their 15 year old agrees.

And some more baby chickens. Because who doesn't want more of these peeking in the windows at you?


Guess I can’t complain about dreaming of Boys 2 Men’s “I Swear”. That’s a way better option than those scurrying mice invading my dreams. Well, unless it’s Jack and Gus and it involves a prince and a glass slipper. I’m on board with those mice... As long as they don't bite.



And because sometimes life is just a crazy adventure, no blonde or farm needed....

Every once in awhile life involves being at Meijer at 9pm in their outdoor furniture section with some cotton candy Twinkies and a bottle of water. You have so many questions? So do I. And if you are intrigued by the cotton candy Twinkies… one was given to the chickens this morning and they refused to eat it. You guys… I’m pretty sure chickens will eat anything… they'll even eat, well, cooked chicken... but not cotton candy Twinkies apparently. I think the chickens know something we don't.


There are some things about being a girl and adulting that I absolutely hate. Like avoid at all costs hate. Anything to do with a car is one of those things. I needed new brakes. Like desperately needed. Like bragging rights 'got the full use out of my brake pads' needed. Today I’m thankful for a friend who instructed me on exactly what to buy and changed them for me. Somehow, in the process, I ended up with this beautiful cup of coffee, hand picked flowers from not one, but two, cute boys, and this adorable face. Talk about full service. Maybe car problems aren’t so bad after all. Really... I just have awesome friends…. Who happen to make pretty cute kids. Just sayin’.


And...


I am almost done with the Old Testament! Woo Hoo! Made my way through the book of Jonah today. Another one I'm sure most of you are familiar with. It's one of the classic childhood stories... Because what kid doesn't want to hear about a man getting thrown overboard, swallowed by a fish and then thrown up onto land. I mean, the whole surviving being eaten by a fish is pretty cool, but still... ewww and gross. Also, the ocean kind of terrifies me and I think it's Jonah's fault.


In all seriousness, I love the grace of God that can be seen in so many aspects of Jonah.


The statement, "God appointed" appears several times in this story.


And I love that for so many reasons.


Jonah ran away from the Lord. Jonah got angry with the Lord. In both situations, God appointed several different things to help Jonah realize the error of his ways. God appointed a fish to swallow Jonah. God appointed a plant to grow and give Jonah shade. God appointed a worm to eat the plant eat so that it died. God appointed a scorching east wind so that the sun would beat down on Jonah and make him weak. Some of these could easily be looked at as cruel and not caring. And yet, in the big picture, they are so intricately placed in Jonah's life at just the right moment to help him get his heart right with the Lord.


Because even in things that seem bad and painful or even downright mean... God truly is working all things together for the good of those who love him. (Romans 8:28)


There's quite a few things in this small 4 chapter book that I'm processing through in my head at the moment.


So... to be continued.


But before I say good night... Two things...

1. Just to be clear, I am not currently sporting orange hair. #pictureproof.










2. And can we pause for a minute and say, "WHAT THE?!?" Who in the world came up with this combination? And why?!?




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